That Drifting Excrement Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the Television Disappointments of the Year.

As we consider the television offerings of the past year, a handful of series emerge not for their excellence, but for their notable failures. Ranging from awkward sequels to bafflingly bad docuseries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with woeful writing, cringe-inducing arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the final series began, it looked like it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the showrunner announced this would be the final series. It ended on a low point; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was just way too symbolic. Still, viewers undeniably had a hoot picking apart every single “wtf?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – twirled around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the smallest of this show's issues. The recipient of a very rare no-star review, it was hard to know where to start listing the flaws. The laughably wooden writing? The mind-numbing glorification of wealth and materialism? The almost deliberate parade of cliches? Acting so poor they felt almost malicious? Let’s just say “all of the above” and forget about this show again. However, a new season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Given the restraining orders, domestic violence allegations and fatherly failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d truly have gleaned it from this three-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of reckless excess while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this volatile personality was being pandered to, so any sympathy this series might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charismatic but flippant egotist.

The Iris Affair

Naturally we knew it was ridiculous from the get-go: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of pure love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Shady figures convening in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a bit dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to accommodate unconvincing dialects. But there were plenty of other issues. Mainly that it was just profoundly dull; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various London rogues which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the degree to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s various ventures into twee homemaking as intentional statements. But then you view them and are compelled to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle magazine animated; a poster for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark platitudes and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by immense, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, self-image, self-acceptance. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to explore them. Instead, the viewing was akin to reading a sales catalogue. She obviously has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As contestants competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too confusing to explain what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a production that was trying way too hard to emulate something far greater than it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How does one follow a show that defined a generation? The pressure was enormous for this glitzy romcom about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who arrives in London with a broken heart. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity cameos involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of gifted younger comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke milked to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The writing room sketches, meanwhile, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled with care. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from strangely breezy, slightly mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Twisted? Perhaps. A total mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We admire the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This globe-trotting thriller about government agencies spying on – and killing off – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality renowned for explicit escapades as she prepared for her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was way more interrogation of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who showed up to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and zero interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the filmmaker has a young daughter too.